The Royal Wedding: On the Scene

(A TESCO stooge [formerly the Duchess of York] handing out crappy paper flags in Trafalgar Square)

Caught the train for Charing Cross Station at about 6:30am. I was expecting a swarm of royal wedding zombies on board but was instead pleasanty surprised to find it mostly empty. I met a nice family from near Manchester who were in town for holiday and were excited to have the chance to soak up the wedding madness.

Exited Charing Cross to find a much more frantic scene. Hordes of people were flooding into Tralfagar Square and down into The Mall. They were decked out in Union Jacks, Canadian maple leaves, Australian flags, St. George crosses, Scottish flags, Welsh Dragons and, of course, images of William and Kate. Every where I looked were banners, signs and t-shirts baring smiling images of the world's most popular wealthy couple.


(Monarchist Canadians looking for some royal back bacon in Trafalgar Square)

Once down into The Mall, it quickly became apparent that I was trying to walk into a wall of red, white and blue bedecked humanity. With my arms full of free flags and other giveaways being doled out by various representatives of various companies and a notebook full of royalist friendly qoutes, I high-tailed it out of there while the getting was good. I swam up stream through people in Union Jack wigs and faces painted in St. George's cross. I scurried quickly through the horde and past the giant screens playing old news reels of the queen's coronation and back into the safety of the train station.


(A pair of Aussies in the midst of a Vegemite and Fosters induced stupor on The Mall)

I rushed on board the #3 train back home and let the silence wrap around me. Just a few hundred yards away were hundreds of thousands of Wills and Kate loving whackos whipped into a frenzy over fairy-tales and patriotism.

Back behind the safety of my keyboard in beautiful SE18, which itself is quite dead, with the wedding on the TV, I can start to relax. The high streets are empty. I can only assume that everyone is in front of the tube watching the spectacle.

The story I wrote was quite rah-rah "we love you, Wills!" type of thing. Don't feel exactly great about it, but at least I was given the chance to write up a piece that ran today (4/29/11) about how most Londoners don't seem to care one way or the other about the wedding. Though, the emptiness of our neighborhood may call that thesis in question. The average Londoner might not care about the wedding . . . all that much, but they still care. As do I. I hate the concept of the monarchy and would love to see the British Republic replace the United Kingdom, but there is something undeniably compelling about the images being broadcast around the world and being in that mad crowd of royalist sentiments was a bit electric. Just try being around that many celebrating people and not pick up a contact high.

So, in summary. Everybody pretends to not care about the royals, but the truth is everybody is fascinated by them. Love or hate them,we are paying attention and discussing them. The monarchy is disgusting but it really puts on an exciting show.


(Kate Middleton moments before the ceremony)